FLAT out bad
It was a wonderful morning…Up before 6 (yeah dude, that’s AM), moved an endless stream of trash bags/cartons/cans to the road for pickup. Since I was away last week we missed our trash day and it always seems like when you go an extra week, there’s more than a week of trash that needs to hit the road.
So I’m pulling out minivan #2 to get at the trash pile in the garage and bump! I think I just drove over someone. I stop, check the mirrors, roll the window down, nothing. I pull back some more, another bump… nothing. I get out and finish the trash run.
I’m just about to climb in the car to pull it back in and notice that my tire is FLAT (bumping mystery solved). I let a curse out just under my breath. I heard it, He heard it, I told myself I gotta stop that.
After spending over an hour and a half figuring out the 20 pages of instructions on changing a flat tire, I had gone through a gambit of curses. I wasn’t speaking curses, I was thinking them and I just couldn’t seem to stop. Does anyone else suffer from a depraved mind? These are the days when I can really relate to Paul’s words:
I don’t understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do the very thing I hate. I know perfectly well that what I am doing is wrong, and my bad conscience shows that I agree that the law is good. But I can’t help myself, because it is sin inside me that makes me do these evil things.
I know I am rotten through and through so far as my old sinful nature is concerned. No matter which way I turn, I can’t make myself do right. I want to, but I can’t. When I want to do good, I don’t. And when I try not to do wrong, I do it anyway. But if I am doing what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing it; the sin within me is doing it.
It seems to be a fact of life that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another law at work within me that is at war with my mind. This law wins the fight and makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.
This passage has such a double meaning for me. First, incredible comfort that a truly great Christian, Paul struggled with things in the same way I do. Conversely, it is my mind that seems to be the problem instead of the solution (see “In my mind I really want to obey“…), ergo if I couldn’t stop my mind, do I really hate what I was doing?! arrgh…
Author: Brett Veenstra | Category: Disciple | Comments(3) February 2006
If your mind is the problem, yet your mind is what controls the possibility of change, isn’t it impossible to change?<br/><br/>This thought is my largest struggle in life. <br/><br/>And I know why….because the question is incorrect. (not that this knowledge ever stops me from running my mind in circles with the question)<br/><br/>Your mind doesn’t control the possiblity of change. Christ does. And letting go of your mind is the impossible part. <br/><br/>Luckily, Christ knew that. Ergo: Death on behalf of our mind. His plan baffles me daily.<br/><br/>Thanks for the good post…helps crazy people feel not so crazy.<br/><br/>ps. i find if something makes my mind run in circles, it’s probably not of Christ. Getting to an ENDING of understanding is a different issue…often times I find that’s exactly the mark of Christ.
Dude that was so deep that I had to read it for 3 days before I could understand it!<br/><br/>Lemme throw a few questions at ja:<br/>- If Christ controls the possibility of change, what does that mean about the parts of you that are not like Christ? Does he not care or are those parts not important? [a baited question to draw that out more]<br/>- How would you contrast the struggle mentioned in Gal 5:17 (you can read the full context here) versus the ENDING of understanding that you mention?<br/><br/>Thanks for the comment and keep ‘em coming!
YO…<br/>Here’s my super-duper-delayed response. I hadn’t checked your comments in a while since there were no new blog entries (hint hint
)<br/><br/>1. As far as Christ controlling the possiblity of change, I would say this to clarify how I think it works: Christ doesn’t control the change, he helps you to make changes you couldn’t on your own (or despite yourself). So, if my mind is the problem, yet my mind controls the change, in theory, I can’t change, right? Well, that’s where, if you ask Christ to step in, he’s got the ‘override’ key for your mind. He’ll change you despite your mind. He’ll hit the ‘bypass’ button, and go right around it…making the impossible possible. That’s my experience anyway.<br/><br/>So, what happens with parts of you that “aren’t like Christ”? Well, I think that’s not really the right question. I think the right question is: “What happens to parts of you that you don’t ask him to help with”. In reality, hardly any of us is “like Christ” in anyway. But, we can all ask for his help to overcome those obstacles. Make sense? I donno if it did or not….<br/><br/>2. I guess, in terms of the “ending of understanding” I’m talking solely of an intellectual angle….understanding in terms of logic. I think this talks about our good and evil natures fighting, which is really a spiritual fight, not really a ‘logical’ fight. But, what I loved in this, that I think DOES apply is the next verse after 17…<br/><br/>”But when you are directed by the Holy Spirit, you are no longer subject to the law.”<br/><br/>To me, this applies directly to logic. The Spirit (and how He works) isn’t subject to the ‘laws of logic’ ….therefore, when you ask him to come in and help (see #1), he’s able to override logic, your brain, and any other ‘laws’ in order to change who you are and how you think….So, if you try and comprehend this, you will get to the “end of understanding” that I talk about. Because then you’re dealing with “heavenly logic” that has no basis in our earthly understanding.<br/><br/>Thats my 2 cents…